It is very clear from my entries that I was very troubled. Sometimes I am amazed that I survived. Even now I compare dad’s sweet letters to what was going on for me at the time and remember how despite having two parents and a brother who loved me I felt very alone and frequently full of anger and shame.
But they never gave up on me though I am sure that my behaviour must have frequently bewildered and worried them.
One constant for me was Eileen Mackinlay, my tutor at Newton Park. She always had faith in me. I worked hard and she believed that I was talented. This meant so much to me. She later published a book about teaching, focusing on students from my year (Shared Experience. Methuen & Co (1972)) and included my thesis and an extract from a letter I wrote to her. She was always positive …and I was so used to criticism and disapproval. She remained my friend until she died in 2003.